Friday, May 27, 2022
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Nobody Said It Would Be Easy

“Why don’t you trust me? Cant you see that I love you? And all that I have done for you?”

How often have people said this to you? How often have you wished they would just stop already.

Well trust is not about what you have been doing. Problem is whilst you are too busy trying to prove that you are trustworthy you are missing some important things.

The first of which being that if you were really worthy of that trust then there would be no need for you to prove any of that in the first place. You earn it by being loyal and not letting me down.

Too often people have done just that, let us down and expect us to just overlook that and be okay with it. But it does not work that way. It takes a lot for someone to finally trust you.

Might even take weeks, months or years but the sad reality is most times that trust is broken within the blink of an eye. One single mistake or wrong move and you are back to where you started again, learning to trust one another. Trust is something that gradually builds itself in a relationship.

Sometimes people do not really get that the whole concept of trust is not so much about whether someone trusts you or not. The major thing you should ask yourself is what have I done to earn that trust, or what have I done to lose or not gain that trust?

Once you focus on those two important questions then you are most likely to get a full understanding of why someone trusts you or not. Trust is something that comes naturally, you do not necessarily have to prove that you are worthy of it, well not consciously anyway. Then with time trust is built in relationships.

Too often we ask that people should trust us yet we go ahead to break that trust. For any relationship to work, you have to believe that your partner is dependable. That they will not let you down. Issues such as constantly telling lies and acting all sneaky are bound to raise suspicion in your partner, but sometimes they choose to believe that you would never hurt them.

If you then go ahead and show that you will betray your partner within a heart beat then everything falls apart.Trust is earned, but often people think that splashing wads of cash will get you partner in their good books. That only goes to show that all you care about is yourself. What you fail to realise is that it takes a lifetime to build up trust but with one simple mistake everything changes.

Many problems that arise are a result of feeling betrayed. It is always good to give your partner the benefit of doubt. Often we create loopholes where there are none. You know what you should do, instead of thinking that your partner is late from work because they are probably cheating on you, why not think that something has gone wrong. Maybe have been involved in an accident.

But like I said, sometimes your history will determine what you think of first. If your partner has lied to you before then you are more skeptical of him/her and will take time to believe anything they say. Once trust is lost it takes a while to get it back.

But even then you have to learn to trust again. Being bitter and resentful in the long run will do you no good except destroy you. Holding on to painful memories will make you miss some wonderful memories.

Rebuilding trust does not happen overnight. It is already difficult enough laying the foundation for that trust so then it can be expected that finding what was lost is twice as difficult. It does not happen overnight but it will take time. You need to take it one step at a time and in time you will find all that you lost and restore it.The most crucial factor that will be able to make you find that trust is time.


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